We’re talking about football only, here. Scottish people support Scotland first, and anyone who England is playing against second. If Scotland aren’t in, say, the World Cup they’ll support Argentina against England, Germany against England, anyone. If there was a team of baby-eating Nazi kitten-killers the Scots would support them if they were playing England.

The Welsh aren’t like this about football. They are anti-English rugby union, but that’s another rant.

The best thing is, English people firstly support England, then they support Scotland, Wales and Ireland. This makes the anti-English stance of the Scots look childish. The English respect for Scotland as a place and a race just winds up the Scots, with their huge inferiority complex, even further. As Renton says in Trainspotting, ‘I don’t hate the English. They’re just wankers.’ That’s enlightened of him, and I reckon that it’s a direct port from Irvine Welsh’s head.

So, English people - let’s support plucky, crap Scotland in their pathetic sporting endeavours. And let’s keep nicking their North Sea oil.